


Why Me?

by PinkAngel_101



Category: Original Work
Genre: Drama, Gay, Love, M/M, Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Passion, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Triggers, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:00:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25078024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PinkAngel_101/pseuds/PinkAngel_101
Summary: Ryuuzaki Amano.The popular star athlete in the Senior Class, comes from a well off wealthy family. All the girls dream to be his. All the guys want to be him. Ryuuzaki is the guy who gets whatever he wants, when he wants it. So why is he not happy with life? Dating the captain of the cheerleader team who is the hottest girl in school along with having money should make him happy right? So why does he feel like something is not quite right, that he is missing something.Hikaru Yamashita.The new junior and loner. Depression, sadness and loneliness fills his life. Sits alone at school listening to music while always wearing a sweater to hide his past attempts. Lives alone with his mother and some days food is considered a luxury to them. Never able to spend enough time in one place to make any friends, that also rules out finding someone to love him for who he is.What will happen when these two guys get thrown together.Is friendship a possibility, which would be a first for Hikaru.Or perhaps something more. Something that Ryuuzaki never thought possible....An original story written by myself.Oc's belong fully to me.Wattpad Account: pinkangel_101





	1. Hikaru Yamashita

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading my Book, Please note the quick following things:
> 
> Any photos used I do not own unless I draw them.....  
> Any Characters used I do not own....UNLESS THEY ARE MY OC's
> 
> DO NOT STEAL MY OC CHARACTERS...  
> DO NOT STEAL OR USE MY STORY PLOTS...  
> DO NOT STEAL / REPOST MY STORIES ANYWHERE...
> 
> I spend so much time and effort coming up with each oc character, as well as the plots of the stories. So please come up with your own and do not copy mine.
> 
> DO NOT POST SPOILERS IN COMMENTS! if you are re-reading this, please be considerate of new readers who have not read my stories. Do not give away spoilers and ruin the book for them!
> 
> If you have read this published elsewhere....please tell me as I only posted it here and on wattpad.
> 
> Some stories do have Trigger Warnings....  
> Thank you for understanding.....please do enjoy!
> 
> Pink Angel~
> 
> Why Me?  
> Written and Published 2015
> 
> Edited 2019
> 
> ......................................

Walking along the halls at school, whispers about myself hit my ears. This wasn't new however, the other students always talked about me behind my back. Ignoring their hushed tones, I place my headphones that were once hanging around my neck over my ears. Cranking up the volume of the very old iPod that rested in my jean pockets. The world around my fades into nothingness, as loud music drown the world out.

As I walked along, passing the other students. Their eyes were easily felt staring at me. Even with the loud music in my ears, I knew exactly what they were saying. Even without hearing them speak. Everywhere I go, the whispers and hushed hurtful remarks are always the same.

_"What a freak!"_

_"Loner"_

_"Creep"_

Pushing my hands inside the pockets of my sweater I walk in silence. Only did I stop for just a moment, my bright blue eyes landed on my reflection. My face stared back at me in the window. Bright dyed flaming red hair, the colour is vivid and the complete opposite to my blackened heart. Staring down at the ground for a moment, I suddenly pull my sweater hood up over my head. I wasn't embarrassed about my choice of dyed hair colour. The complete opposite to be honest. I did enjoy it. Though it did add to all the whispers from the other students. Walking off once more, my eyes look before me as I make my way in silence.

...

After leaving school, I find myself standing before my home. That is, if you can even call this shit hole a home.

Walking inside the crappy apartment building, I walk to the unit me and my mom live in. Using the key I unlock the door and slowly push it open. Once again, the door gets jammed up on nothing. Grumbling I push it a little harder until it opens just enough for my small body to squeeze through the gap.

Now inside I shut the door with a little bit of a struggle. When it finally does shut for me, I place both hands upon it. A deep sigh escapes my lips as I press my forehead to it for just a moment.

This was my life.

Turning I glanced at the small one bedroom unit we share. The place is entirely filled of boxes and moving supplies. And no, it wasn't like we just moved in. This is just how we lived. Weaving my way along the living room that barely had no floor showing, I make it to the kitchen. I was starving as I opened the fridge only to shut it moments after.

Again, this was my life.

With the fridge practically empty, my eyes land on a box of crackers. Making my way to them I pick up the box and open it eagerly to eat something.

As stated, this was a one bedroom. My mom and myself share the room and bed together most nights. On my way to the bedroom I stop for a moment, on the couch sleeping soundly was my mom. The only reason I do not complain about our life or how we live is because of her. I know she is doing her best for us, I see just how strong she is. To me, my mom was my hero. 

"How many times must I tell you, sleep in the bed mom." The soft whispers left my voice as I walk over to her form. Grabbing the blanket off the back of the couch, I gently lay it over her tiny form. A rare soft smile crosses my lips, as I tuck some of her back hair behind her ear. "Sweet dreams mom." Giving her forehead a soft kiss, I turn to make my way back towards the bedroom.

That was until I noticed a folder on the coffee table, that captured all my attention.

_'Hikaru Yamashita'_

Seeing my name on the folder, I already got a sense of what it was. Picking it up on my pale hands I opened it, confirming my previous thoughts. There before my eyes were school transfer forms.

"Least we never unpack anymore." I mumbled as I put the folder back down and entered the tiny bedroom.

Staring around the room, all my belongs remained packed inside the brown cardboard boxes. I once learned the hard way, that is was useless and a waste to even unpack them. As a younger kid I always would. I always got excited about being in a new place. Having a new room to make my own. But now that I am older, I know not to bother.

Even if I did unpack them, only in a month or two I would need to repack them all up once again. So why bother?

My mom is working on finishing her schooling, on becoming a full fledged medical doctor. She did the courses and the school part. However now she needs to get in enough hours of work, before she can be considered a true doctor at a hospital, as well as getting her degree. So for the last ten years she has been aiming for this. So the only setback to all of this?

To get her work experience hours in, she keeps getting transferred from hospital to hospital. We have not lived in the same city or town for more than two months. Our record though was in this one small town, we stayed there for about half a year.

My Mother knows how hard all of this is on me. She is the one to see and know, just how bad my depression is.

Removing my sweater, I move to sit on the hard squeaky bed. My blue eyes travel down to my left arm. Out of habit my finger traces the scars of my past, the scars to haunt me the rest of my life. There is no running from them.

"Guess I get to be a freak at yet another new school." The deflated whisper leaves my lips. Falling softly backwards onto the bed, I stare up at the cracked and pained chipped ceiling. A heavy sigh escapes my form as I lay there in silence.

Once my mom finally gets her degree, and become a doctor. Our life will finally change for the better. She will be able to find a permanent position at a hospital, we will finally be able to settle down somewhere. Maybe when that day comes, I could finally make a friend. Rolling onto my side I stare at the blank faded creamed wall. It like the ceiling, has cracks and peeling paint. The thought of once we settle down hits my heart hard. When that day comes, maybe, just maybe I could meet someone to fall in love with.

Once my mind thinks this I let out a sad pathetic soft laugh. "Who am I kidding. No guy would ever want to be with a freak like me." I knew this to be a fact, and this is what I constantly thought.

Hearing the bedroom door squeak open, I remain staring at the wall before my face. Feeling the bed creak I then feel warmth on my body as an arm wraps over me. I shivered not realizing how cold I truly was. Shifting in my place I roll onto my other side so I face my mom. I scoot closer to her, as she hugs me tighter under the blankets. Her hand rubbing my side as I let my face rest against her neck.

"Hika, you saw the papers didn't you?' She whispers in her soft angelic voice.

I nod my head slightly against her neck. "Yah mom, I saw them." I answer her back in a soft monotone voice.

"I promise you, this move will be the last." I pulled my face from her warm neck and looked up at her. "I want to see you happy again Hika." The sadness in her voice was clearly heard. "I dream of the day you introduce me to a special someone."

"Mom, that will never happen. No one will ever want me." I mumbled sadly. After all, I was damaged goods.

"Never say never baby." She hugs me closer as she whispers softly to me. "Trust me, one day. One day you will meet a guy, and then you wont be able to get your mind off of him." She spoke gently in a soft tone. One of her hands moved up to my dyed hair as she ruffled it affectionately.

"Thanks mom, for everything." The whisper left my lips as I closed my eyes. I cuddled up closer to her again as I fell asleep in the embrace of her warmth. Again, my mother is my hero. I love her dearly, and she loves me for who I am. I could never ask for a more beautiful women, to be my mom.

...

Waking up the following morning, I found myself alone. Knowing full well my mom left for work, I sit up and glance around the bedroom. "Guess only Three more nights here." The papers said I was to start my new school Monday morning. And today was Friday, that would leave us the weekend to load up our things and make the transition.

Crawling off the bed I see a pair of my black jeans. Walking to them I pull them up, as well as pulling on a light black long sleeved shirt. Grabbing my signature black sweater, I pull it onto my body over my shirt. If you can't guess by now, Black is my favourite choice of colour to wear.

Placing my headphones on over my ears. I find myself leaving my home, for yet another last and final day at yet another school.

For myself, the morning classes passed me by in a blur. Then again to be honestly speaking, I was barely paying attention in any of them. It was my last day here, today didn't matter at all to me. On lunch break I was sitting outside on the grass. My body propped up leaning against a tree trunk. Music was blaring in my ears, as my sweater hood covered my hair.

With my eyes closed, I never once noticed the presence of the other approaching me. So the moment I felt a tap on my shoulder, my eyes opened wide in shock. Standing before me was a girl from my science class. She was a quiet girl, and we were actually partners in class for the past month. Removing my headphones slowly I stared up at her in confusion.

"I heard today was your last day here Hikaru." Her voice was soft, a hint of shyness heard in it. She moved and sat beside me on the grass as I shrugged.

"Yah." That was all I replied with. It was mumbled out like I didn't care one bit about leaving this place. Though this quiet girl, she was the only one who was ever nice to me here. Though we weren't friends at all, we never spoke outside of science class. Then again in class we barely spoke to one another as well.

"I, uhh w-well." I glance to her in slightly curiosity. Her cheeks turned a slight pink as she looked down nervously. "I'm going to miss you Hikaru."

"Why?" The blunt question left me and stabbed her almost like a knife.

Her face now burning a deep red as she leaned in closer to my form. "Because I l-like you." Her whisper was soft and quiet, but I heard it easily enough. She was bold and leaned in closer until her pink lips were against mine. I could only sit there shocked as to what she was doing. When she pulled away her gaze was shy, as she nervously asked. "Will you miss me too?"

"No." My voice was blank of all emotions as I stared into her eyes.

Anyone would be able to see the hurt in her eyes. She probably took all her effort and will power to confess to me, and there I was shooting her down instantly with zero hesitation. "That kiss." She whispered painfully. "You felt nothing?"

"No." I repeated my emotionless answer once more. Putting my headphones back on over my ears, I stood up. Shoving my hands into my sweater pockets I walked off leaving her there, not even glancing back once.

Was it cruel of me to that to her? Sure it was. But after all. Once today is over, she would never see me again. Yes I could have probably handled that situation in a more delicate way. But this was who I was. Besides if she knew me one bit, she would know I only lean towards liking guys and not girls.

Letting out a deep sigh, I glance my eyes up towards the blue sky. A whisper escapes my lips, as pain from my heart sounds in my five little words.

"How I hate my life."

...


	2. Settling In

My feet led me along the apartment unit that was our latest home. No more boxes filled the place as it was now empty, minus all the big furniture. However for the first time since stepping foot into this one bedroom apartment, I was shocked at how big it looked empty. For a place for us that was always so cramped and cluttered up with boxes. This place wasn't actually that bad.

I walked to the empty bedroom and stared at the bed we slept on together. My eyes traced the cracked and peeling paint. I definitely would not be missing this place, that was for sure.

"Hika, do you have everything?" My mother asked me from the living room where she stood.

Staring into the bedroom for another moment I finally replied to her question. "Yah." Turning my back on yet another old room and home, I walk past my mom and exit our unit. Waiting for her to lock up the final moment we walked down to the main lobby of the building where she met the landlord and handed in the keys.

Leaving the building my eyes instantly land on our van we own, it just like all our homes is worn down and old. But it gets us to where we need to be. The back seat and trunk is just filled to the max with items and cardboard boxes. This is how we lived. We always move in one go. We then rent furnished homes and apartments, leaving us just needing to pack our own items.

Climbing into the front passenger seat of the van, I lean back into the seat and stare out the window.

"Will you miss it here?" My mom asks as she too climbs in, and starts up the engine. I knew she didn't just mean the apartment, but this town, the school.

"No." My answer was short in reply and dead on. There was absolutely nothing here I would miss. Not anything.

"Is there no one who you will miss?" She asked, though she already knew my answer for that.

"No."

"I am sure some kids from school will miss you."

My mind for a split moment went to that girl from school. The girl who was my science partner. I remember her kissing me just the other day, and confessing her feelings to me. "No mom, no one will miss me." My voice is void of all emotion. 

With the sound of a sign escaping my mother we drive off away from the apartment.

"I promise you Hika." Her voice was soft as she spoke quietly. "This is the last move. We will stay in our new place long enough for you to finish your junior year, and graduate your senior year of high school."

As much as I wanted to believe her. I couldn't. So I remained silent as she drove us out of the town.

...

"Hika." I softly feeling my body being shaken. "Hunny, wake up. We are here."

"Huh?" I mumbled. My eyes opened and I saw it was dark out. At some point on the drive I must have fallen asleep. But here we were, a new city and a new life awaiting us. My eyes flicker to my mom as she smiled softly.

"Welcome home hunny." I follow her gaze to look out the window. Before us is a pretty run down looking home. "It may not look like much from the outside. But we will have plenty of space here."

I stared in wonder at the house most people would scoff at. Most wouldn't even give it a double take. Climbing out of the van, I remove the hood of my sweater from my head. My dyed hair falling across my eyes, as I blink them in silence. I noticed the neighborhood didn't look that great. It seemed run down. and most the houses did as well. My eyes flicker back to my mom who is already walking up to the main doorway and pulls out a key. I watch her unlock the from door as it opens up before us.

With a soft creak, the door opened as she walked in. Slowly I hesitantly follow behind her. Inside the place however, looked much nicer then it did outside. I was expecting cobwebs everywhere, as well as broken floor pieces. But it was actually decent inside this run down place. There was a small living room that contained couches, coffee table and a television. The flooring was a soft carpet, as I walk to the kitchen. We had a decent sized one at that. Stove, oven. Freezer, fridge, microwave and sink. What more did we need?

"Your bedroom is upstairs." I look to my mom in a stunned silence. "Mine is on the main floor just down that hallway." She pointed with a gesture. "There is also a bathroom next to mine."

I didn't want to ask this, but it blurted out as quickly as it came to my mind. "How, how can we afford a house this size?"

My mother's smile was beautiful as she chuckled. "The price is actually better than what I was paying for the last apartment. We get a lot more space, our own bedrooms. Plus we will be saving money in rent, allowing us to spend more for food."

"Why is this place so cheap?" I looked to her in a worry.

"Hika, you saw the outside, the neighborhood. This home is in a not so desirable location for most, but we lived in worse neighborhoods before." I nodded at her statement. That was very true, we once lived where homeless men and women slept outside our building. "This place is perfect for us." That smile she gave off, warmed my heart greatly. "Go check out your new bedroom. Then we can start unpacking the van."

Nodding my head, I basically turned and rushed up the stairs. I haven't had my own room in so long.

Stopping at the top of the stairs, I saw a tiny hallway. Glancing to the left I see a door as I walk to it. My pale hand places on the handle as I turned it open. Upon it opening my blue eyes take in a bathroom. There was a shower and tub, as well a counter and sink. This meant me and my mom even had our own bathrooms. This was exciting.

My eyes then landed on the second and last door upstairs. My feet led me to it quickly as I opened it up and saw the bedroom.

It wasn't huge. But it is bigger then the last one me and mom shared, that is for sure. I took in the bed that sat in the corner against the wall. A small window over top of it on the wall. There was a closet across the room, something I would never use. I then noticed there were empty wooden book shelves, as well as book cases. I already again know I wont use those either. I do not plan to unpack a single one of my boxes. Because I do know the truth. The very moment I do, we will need to repack and move.

Walking over to my new bed, I sit down and lean my back against the wall. A sigh escapes my lips as I knew what awaited me tomorrow.

"Tomorrow, I start at yet another new school." I whisper out softly to no one but myself. I have been the new kid, at way to many schools to be able to keep track of them by now. 

"Give it a month." I whisper to myself as my fingers play with the end of my left sleeve of my sweater. Mom promised this will be our last move. However I know better then to believe that. I know the truth, the moment I allow myself to settle in. I will be ripped apart from everything.

Standing from the bed, I make my way back down to where my mom is. We spend the next hour unpacking our van into the living room. Then I worked on taking my personal boxes upstairs. I stack them up against the wall as I then lay on my bed after putting clean bedding on it.

Soon sleep took over me. Knowing tomorrow, would be a day of hell.

...

Dressed in all black the following morning, as per my usual. I pulled on my black sweater, and glanced at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. My vivid flaming, red hair pops out in contrast to the black clothes I am wearing. As well as my pale skin. Walking down the stairs my mother meets me with a smile.

"I hope you have a good first day, today Hika." She hugs me tightly in her embrace as I sighed.

I give a small smile to reassure her, as I hugged her back. "I will try mom." I reply in a whisper. 

Leaving the house in the early morning, I place my headphones on my ears. Blasting my music, I walk down the street with my hands in my pocket. We looked up the route to get to the school, So I knew exactly how to get there.

The moment however I reach the school grounds, I pause in my steps. Glancing around the grass and pavement, I already see it. Groups of friends hanging out together. They are all smiling, as well as seeming to have a good time. Dropping my shoulders slightly, my head hangs faintly. I then make my way through the front gates of this new hell.

...


	3. Ryuuzaki Amano

Waking up in the morning, I stretch my body out on my soft cozy bed. Blinking my deep brown eyes opened, I am met with brown hair fallen before them. Pushing my shaggy hair back with my hand, I let out a deep tired yawn. How I was far, from wanting to be awake.

Knowing I couldn't push getting up, off any longer. I sat up slowly. My soft bedding falling off my bare chest, and landing down on my lap. Kicking off the remaining blankets, I let my legs move to hang off my large bed. Forcing myself to stand, my bare feet land on the plush carpet. 

Walking across my room, I enter my personal attached bathroom. Scratching my head, my feet lead me to my sink. Glancing up at my reflection, I see just how messy my shaggy dark brown hair is. It falls around my face, and slightly covers my eyes at times. Pushing my hands through my hair, I move it away from my face.

Once I was done getting myself ready in the bathroom, I walk back into my bedroom. Making my way to my closet, I pull the door opened my eyes scan my clothes. I had a very set style that I wore, It was usually always the same. It was, well it was me.

Grabbing the dark washed blue jeans, I pull them up onto myself over my boxers. Next my hands grabbed a white button up shirt. Dressing into it, I buttoned up the buttons. However I did always leave the first couple unbuttoned, not to mention I never tuck it into my pants. But that isn't all I wear. Grabbing the more formal type vest. I pull it on over my white shirt leaving it undone and hanging on my body loosely. 

On my way out from my bedroom, I grab my sunglasses and place them on top of my head. Walking the hall of our pretty huge house, my feet lead me down the main stairway. 

Entering the huge kitchen, there I see my little sister. She is perched on a chair at the table, eating away at her bowl of cereal.

The moment she heard my soft footsteps approaching, her head looked up. "Morning Ryuu-nii." Her smile was so soft and sweet, it made it impossible not to return a smile. "Mom and dad left for work already." She spoke before taking another big bite from her bowl.

"Morning Akira." Walking past her, I made sure to stop and ruffle her short blonde hair with my hand. Knowing full well she hated this action, but hey. That is what big brothers are for.

"Hey! Ryuu-nii stop that!" She gasped out as I laughed. Her hand shot up and worked on slapping my own away from her soft hair. She huffed as she fixed her hair before watching me sitting down next to her at the table. I poured my own bowl of cereal as she spoke up softly once more. "Could you take me shopping today? After school is done?"

Blinking my gaze to her, I gave off an polite smile. "Sorry Akira, I would. But I have practice after school, how about I take you tomorrow?"

"Okay, thanks!" She smiled happily as we both ate.

Looking to the small girl, I smiled. This little girl is literally the heart and soul of my family. Before she came to us, well it was like I was walking around on eggshells. So the day my parents adopted her, changed everything for the better. Her short blonde hair falls just past her chin. She has the most beautiful soft, porcelain skin. Then there are her bright green eyes. They shine like emeralds when she smiles. Me and Akira, may not be blood related. But I would kill anyone who dared to harm my little sister.

She is younger than myself by four years, being currently thirteen years of age. Though over half the time. The way she speaks, she sounds a lot like the older one of the two of us.

"Ryuu-nii?" I at first hated her little nickname for me. But within time, it grew on me. And she is the only one allowed to call me, such a name.

"Huh?" Glancing up to her, she was gazing at me with concern in her green eyes.

A soft sigh escaped her, as she let out a soft laugh. "You didn't hear a single thing I just said, did you?"

Letting out a soft shrug I shook my head. "Sorry, my mind was off somewhere. What were you saying?"

She let out a playful giggle. "I was asking about your anniversary. Do you have any thing special planned?"

Upon her statement, my spoon fell from my hands. It clattered loudly on the table, as I cleared my throat. "What?"

Another musical giggle escapes her pink lips, as she shook her head. "Honestly, boys don't pay any attention do they?" Gazing into my brown eyes, she only laughs again. "It's a good thing I reminded you then, huh? Leaves you plenty of time to plan something." A sinister smirk crossed her features. "If you forgot, ah man. Would Yumi ever be upset with you. Perhaps I should have kept it to myself."

My sister has made her feelings very clear. She absolutely hated my choice of girlfriend.

"Well, thanks." I whispered ashamed with myself. Akira is right though. Yumi would have made the biggest scene and fuss, if I did forget. "Has it really been almost one year, since I started dating her?" I muttered in shock.

"Much to my displeasure, yes." Shooting Akira a glare, she merely shrugs it off. "Hey, I call it how I see it Ryuu-nii. Besides, I have said it many times before. You could do SO much better, than her." She made clear to emphasize her words.

"Why do you hate her so much anyways?" I asked suddenly. "Yumi is a great girl."

"Why is she so great exactly?" Akira shot her question back at me quickly. "Because she is the captain of the cheerleader team? Hottest girl in school? Even I make better grades than she does. Everyone knows it Ryuu-nii, all she cares about is herself. Her looks, her money, dating you, because our family has money. Because you are the soccer captain. It's all about appearance for her."

I sat there in complete dead silence. I listened to Akira scolding me, and the sad truth? Everything she just said, is all true. So why am I even with her?

"But you want to know the main reason, why I do not like her?" My gaze went back to her, her voice now softer and more caring.

"And why would that be?" I asked out in a quiet whisper. When your younger sister scolds you, it is never a good feeling. Especially when she is right.

"She doesn't make you happy." I stared at her blankly as she spoke up again. "When you are with her, you never smile. Not anymore. Maybe at the beginning you did, but now. You never smile around her."

"I." Before I can finish my thoughts, the clock on the wall behind Akira, catches my eyes. "Shit, I have to go."

"Better hurry Ryuu-nii. Wouldn't want her majesty to freak out, that you were late again in picking her up." Akira grinned madly as she mocked me.

"I have had, almost enough out of you." I growled deeply.

A horn honking from outside, could be heard. Akira jumped up from her seat as she ran to grab her school bag. "Oh, that's my ride. See you later!" She ran out of the kitchen before I even had a chance to say anything.

Standing myself I grab my car keys, and throw my school bag over my shoulder. "She doesn't make me happy huh?" I muttered to myself as I walked to the entrance. Slipping my shoes on, I stepped outside. I watched Akira climbing into the car, her best friends mom was driving. They all waved at me as I waved back.

A thought hit me, did just Akira think that about me and Yumi? Or did everyone else think the same way. To our classmates, and the entire senior high school. We are the perfect couple. Both captains of our teams. Both most popular in the school. Naturally we should be together. I mean, it makes the most sense. Or is that the only reason I am with her?

Shaking my head, to rid myself of these thoughts. I lock the front door, and walk to my car.

Getting inside it, I start up the ignition. Backing out of the driveway, I pull onto the street and drive off. Soon I parked on the side of the street, before another expensive large home. Honking my horn a couple of times, I remain seated with the engine running. 

Moments later the front doors open and out walks Yumi. She is dressed in her traditional, cheerleader uniform. Her long black hair falls down her back. She has dark blue eyes that I used to love to gaze into. However at this very moment, they stare at me filled with annoyance. Groaning I unlock the passenger door as she climbs in.

"You're late." Were the first words to escape her lips.

"Sorry, me and Akira were talking this morning. Lost track of the time is all."

Glancing over my shoulder I go to pull the car back onto the street, when she huffed out. "You're not even going to, say how I look today?" 

Quickly looking to her I shrug, "You look the same, as every other day." I mumbled the truth. In reality, she wore the same thing every day at school. So why must I comment on it daily? That just sounds like a chore.

I heard her huff out angrily to herself. "How come you never walk to my front door anymore Ryuuzaki? All you ever do now, is wait in the car. Honking that damn annoying horn."

My mind can't really focus. The whole way to school, all she did was nag and nag me.

_"She doesn't make you happy. When you are with her, you never smile. Not anymore. Maybe at the beginning you did, but now. You never smile around her."_

The truth stings me, I hate to admit my thirteen year old sister is correct. But lately, I just don't even know anymore. Sighing I park into a stall at the school parking lot. Getting out of the car I lock it up and start to head to the building. Not before Yumi walks next to me, and clutches onto my arm tightly. The looks she gave other girls, she was totally bragging silently to them. That I was her's, and not theirs.

The more I am thinking of everything now, I am struggling to come up with an answer. As to, why I am exactly still even dating her.

...

School that day, passed by practically in a blur. Before I knew it, I found myself in the guys changing room. Sitting on the bench I held my shirt in my hand, just sitting there silently.

"Earth to Ryuu." My head snapped up. Standing before me was my beset friend. "You are starting to stare off in la-la land." He grinned playfully at me. But I knew, behind that grin was concern.

"Ah, I just have a lot on my mind is all." The muttered words left my lips. His eyes look to me once more, and he gives me a complete _'bullshit'_ look. "Really Toshi, I promise I am fine."

"Fine, if you say so." A deep sigh escaped him. "Just hurry your ass up. We can't have our own captain, being late for practice." he winked playfully, then rushed from the room to the soccer field.

...

When practice was over, I could be found leaning against my car. My back to it, as a cigarette was between my lips. Raising my lighter, the soft flickering flame lit the stick up. Taking a nice deep puff of it, I close my eyes. The memories of earlier today entering my mind, as I blew the cigarette smoke out.  
  


_Classes were done for the day, and I was on my way to change for practice. That was until the Principle stopped me anyway._

_"Ah, Ryuuzaki. I know you are about to go to practice. But I need just a moment of your time."_

_Nodding my head, I had no way to really say no. "Of course Mr Nakahara." So instead of going to the change rooms, I followed after him to his office._

_"You are in no trouble Ryuuzaki." He gave me a soft look. "However I do have a request of you."_

_Unsure what the hell he wanted, I sat there a little confused. "Uhh, okay?"_

_I watched pride fill his eyes and face, when he spoke about me next. "You are the captain, and our star soccer player in the school. Not to mention your grades are top shelf, in every subject." He glanced at me through his glasses. "Starting Monday, we have a new transfer student. His mother confessed to me, he has a hard time fitting in or making friends."_

_"So, what do you want me to do exactly?" I was even more confused now._

_"Simple. I want you to be his, one would say his school mentor." The principle eyed me as I cocked up one eyebrow at him. "Also, I wish you to be his tutor for mathematics. His transcripts from his last schools, all show he struggles in that lesson."_

_"I, uhh." I was speechless. There was no way I wanted to tutor someone._

_"Of course by accepting all this. There will be notes on your school records, that will help towards college acceptance. Not to mention, you will receive extra credit for this."_

_"So, I just have to tutor this new kid?"_

_"Yes, even if just only once a week. We both know you are a buy man Amano, between practice, the big games as well as school work. I just want to make him feel welcomed here, and enjoy his time with us."_

_A deflated sigh left my lips, as I felt myself nodding my head. "What is his name?"_

_"Hikaru Yamashita, he is also only a Junior. A class, and year younger than yourself."_

_Nodding my head I agreed to all of this. "I may not be a good tutor. But I will do my best Mr Nakahara."_

_"I knew you were the right choice to count on. Now, I have taken up enough of your time. You have a practice to get to. We can't afford to lose the big match coming up really soon." He smiled at me, as I quickly left his office._   
  


And this led to me here, smoking a cigarette after practice.

Puffing the white stick, I finish it as I sighed out deeply. I was no longer looking forward to Monday morning, not at all now. Dropping the cigarette butt, I crushed it with my shoe. Before getting into my car.

"Why me?" I muttered out annoyed, as I drive off home.

...


	4. The New Kid

Once entering the main building of the school. Glancing around the hallways, I was in the direction I think the Principles office is.

My headphones still over my ears, my black form walks the halls in silence. Then just like always, the students in the halls around me. All stop their conversations to glance in my direction. Some point at my form, others whispering to themselves and their friends.

"And it begins." the words left my lips in a soft quiet voice.

When I finally found my destination, I pulled off my hood, as well as my headphones. I let them rest around my neck once more, as I enter the principles office. My dyed hair now showing, stands out like mad against my choice of clothing.

Walking up to the secretary desk, I notice her eyes look up to me. Through her rectangular glasses, I saw it as clear as daylight. The look of disdain crossed her eyes. Again, I was also used to the teachers, as well as the faculty members looking at me oddly as well.

"How may I help you?" She asked me finally. Her eyes looked up to my bright hair as she glanced down to the papers before her. Her question, honestly pissed me off.

"Well, why else would I be in here?" I spoke back annoyed. "This is the principal's office, is it not? I am here to see him, naturally. Not like I came here for any other reason." My hands shoved into my sweater pockets as I sighed. "Look, I am new here. First day, so I was told to come see him." I mumbled as my bright blue eyes looked towards the window.

If the lady wasn't annoyed with me already, she hated me now. "Take a seat, and you would be wise to learn how to watch your tone of attitude here. I will let Mr Nakahara, know you are here."

Looking over, I see chairs against a wall. Going to them, I left my body flop down onto one. A deep exhausted sigh escapes my lips. How I didn't want to be here.

Waiting for some time, finally I hear a door opened. Out walks a male student, most likely he got sent here for causing trouble. At least that is what the, pissed off look on his face makes me believe.

"Mr Nakahara, will see you now." 

Glancing to the secretary. I stand up and walk past her and her desk, without so much of a nod, or even a glance. Entering the office I close the door behind me.

Sitting at his desk, the principal sits. There is a folder before him, already opened. I take in his appearance, He is an older man. Perhaps in his mid forties. His dark hair is starting to show grey streaking in it, the stress from the students probably adding to that a lot. His blue eyes look to me, from behind the glasses that sit on his nose.

"Hikaru Yamashita, do come in." Least compared to that witch at the desk, he seems a little nicer. "Please, take a seat." Motioning to the chairs across from himself and his desk. Silently I walk across the office and sit facing him. "Let me be the first to welcome you to, Okayama High School." He may seem nice, but I already know. This man is way to cheery for my liking. 

Looking to his folder he picks up papers. I silently sit there, just watching him. "So, I see here that you have been to many schools within the past couple of years." His blue eyes flicker to me, however I remain silent. My face blank of emotion as I inwardly groaned. He clearly knows that from my files, so why waste the time and ask me. "Right." He cleared his throat, once he noticed I wasn't going to reply. "Lets go over your classes then."

Handing me a piece of paper. I merely just stared at it for a moment, before taking it in my own hand. My eyes go over the courses marked down.

_'Science, English, Mathematics, Social Studies, Physical Education, Advanced Literature'_

"Does everything seem correct to you?" He asked curiously.

"Why am I signed up for, Advanced Literature?" The question left my lips, the instant my eyes saw it on the paper.

"Ah, well your mother thought you may enjoy it. She says, you are very fond of writing. However our only free spot, was in our senior class." Glancing to the principal, I watched him flipping through the papers in my file. "I did notice that in every school. Math seems to be your weakest field of study."

My only response to him, was a shrug of my shoulders.

"Your mother, and myself already discussed this issue. So I have signed you up for a tutor."

"Wait, what?" My voice clearly sounded annoyed. "I don't need a damn stupid tutor."

"Hikaru, it has already been arranged. Both by your tutor, and your mother. She has offered him your home, every Tuesday after classes for studying."

"This is absolutely stupid, I don't need some stuck up tutor." I was grumbling under my breath, as a knock sounded on the wooden door.

"Ah, do come in!" He called out as I sat there. Arms crossed, glaring at the desk before me.

"Mr Nakahara, I do hope I am not interrupting." A deep voice spoke out, however I refused to move my glare from the desk.

"Nonsense Ryuuzaki, this is perfect timing. I was just telling Hikaru here, that you are arranged to go to his home Tuesdays for tutoring. Do have a seat." He motioned to the second chair, right beside mine. "Hikaru, I also asked Ryuuzaki here, to be your school mentor. He is in the senior class, and agreed to show you around the school. Any questions, he will be there to help answer them."

I remained perfectly silent after he finished speaking. My eyes still downcast, as I finally spoke. "Can I go now?"

"Yes, of course. You have a free period to start, use this time to get a layout of the school."

"Yah, whatever." I mumbled as I stood up. I grabbed my bag that I had on the floor next to my chair. Hurrying from his office, I didn't want to be anywhere near my so called 'tutor' and 'mentor'. Walking down the hall, I honestly have no idea where I am even going.

"Hey, wait!" I heard that deep voice clearly, I knew it was meant for me. But I refused to stop my steps. "Look, you don't even know where you are going. Let me help show you around. Show you where your locker is, your classrooms."

Finally stopping in my tracks, I took a deep breath and glanced behind me. The guy standing there, he was tall compared to me, but almost every guy and girl is. Even through his damn shirt and vest, you can clearly tell, he is well built and toned. Just one look was all it took, to realize this guy was a jock. Most likely super popular with everyone at this school, as well. His longer shaggy brown hair, fell across his face as he stepped up to me. He looked at me with piercing dark brown eyes. I would be blind if I said he was ugly. He was clearly attractive. However, this was the type of person, I want nothing to do with.

"Look, forget about what he said." I mumbled, meaning Mr Nakahara. "I will figure this out on my own." Turning once more, I start walking off again.

I could hear a deep sigh escape the male. "Come on man, you are going the wrong way anyways. Look, I'm not thrilled of the idea about being a so called 'mentor'. Don't even get me started on the tutoring, I will probably be shit at it.

Stopping in tracks, my hands shove into my pockets as I glance behind once more at him. The opened window next to us, had the sun shining on him. It shined off his hair as the soft breeze coming from it, ruffled it softly. His tanned skin, seemed to glow softly. He was a very attractive male, one I could easily gaze at all day long. Hissing at my inner thoughts, I looked away from him annoyed.

"At least let me show you to your locker. Then your classes. I can at least do that much properly for you. It must suck and be hard, being the new kid. Not knowing anyone."

Shrugging, I cut him off. "You get used to it." Looking to him once more, I have to tilt my head up slightly to meet his gaze. Damn tall guys. "Fine." I eventually mutter.

Watching him give off a handsome smile, he starts walking the way we just came from. My eyes kept on him, as I walked behind him slightly. He was so tall. Again though, I was short for a guy. My height stood around five feet. But this guy, he has to be around six in a half feet tall. He is tall, muscular, handsome. Compared to him. I looked like a scrawny child.

"I'm Ryuuzaki Amano by the way." He glanced to me, and I adverted my eyes from him to the ground quickly.

"Hikaru Yamashita." I mumbled back to him

"Well Hikaru." He goes to reach for my schedule in my hands. I freeze suddenly, stepping away from him. "Ah, sorry." He mumbled confused. "I just wanted to see what locker number you were."

"Could have just asked." I grumbled.

"Ok, fine then. What locker number are you?" He asked me softly.

"This is stupid." I grumbled, before shoving my schedule into his hands.

This caused a deep soft laugh to escape him. "Not a people person, are you?" Looking at the paper, he leads me down a hall and stops before a locker. "Here we go, locker 107." Ignoring him I opened it up with the combination given to me. Placing my bag inside it I heard him speak once more. "Right, let me show you your classes."

Silently I just follow after him, as he leads me along the halls once more. The silence around us, was a little awkward after a while. I thought of maybe saying something to him, but that went out the window when a girl started calling his name.

"Ryuu! There you are. I have been looking all over for you." Silently I stood there watching. Before I knew it, a cheerleader with long black hair walked over to him. She didn't care about others around, as her arms flew around his neck. She pulled my so called 'mentor' down and kissed him deeply on the lips.

"Yumi." He mumbled and lightly pushed her off of himself. He almost seemed a bit annoyed by her presence. "Not now, I am busy."

That was when her sharp eyes, fell upon my form. "Who the hell is the little creep?"

"Yumi!" Ryuuzaki gasped out.

This wasn't something new to me though. "Whatever, I'm so out of here." I grumbled out. I pulled my black hood up over my messy red hair, before walking off silently.

"Hikaru, come on, wait." 

However, I merely ignored him as I walked off. I was right, I knew deep down this place was going to be like the others. It was going to be hell.

...


	5. Classes Begin

Sitting in the back of the classroom, my mind drifts off. I barely can focus on what the teacher is saying. After I left that jock and, who was most likely his bitchy girlfriend. Eventually I found my first class of the day.

When I first got to the class, the teacher asked me to stand before everyone and to introduce myself.

Naturally, that did not play out well. Instead, I shoved my hands into my pockets as always. Then I walked to the empty desk, I spotted in the back row. Besides, no one needs to learn anything about myself. There are way more important things, than learning my life story. Plus I do not believe my mom, not one bit. She promises we won't move until I graduate my senior year. Though I am expecting in a month or two, to once again transfer schools. So really, why should I even attempt to make friends? It is all just pointless.

Ignoring the teachers lesson. A soft sigh escapes my lips, as I doodle random drawings and designs over my notebook. Glancing to the clock I groaned out. It was about to be lunch time. However after that, there was about four hours left of the day to go.

When the end of period bell finally rang. Grabbing my books and belongings, I found my way once more back to my locker. Dropping off my school books, I then grab my lunch. 

There was zero chance, of me even stepping foot inside of the cafeteria. It would be way too loud for my liking, not to mention it would just give reason to be stared at. So instead I headed out back. I left the school building and eyed the green fields.

Pulling my headphones on, I then covered my hair with my hood once again. Listening to the music, I made my way along the field. Nearing the edge of it, I notice not as any students here. My eyes instantly went to a tree, as my feet automatically led my form over to it. There I sat down and leaned my back up against the trunk of it.

My blue eyes looked upwards at the clear blue sky. Removing my headphones, I glance around and see some students laughing together. Some walking around the field. Others sitting in places, while others played some games. The sun shone down brightly today, making it feel like it was a hot summer day. Though I only pull my sweater even tighter around my form, as my eyes close faintly.

"Ryuu, pass!" My eyes snapped open, the moment I heard a voice call out.

"Nice one Ryuu!"

Glancing to the soccer field, I saw him. That jock, also known as my stupid school mentor. There he was playing a game of soccer, with a group of his friends. They were most likely all jocks, probably all on his team too.

"Toshi, heads up!" Ryuuzaki's deep voice called out. He kicked the round ball, to his friend perfectly.

It wasn't like I planned to come out here and stalk him. That was far from my intentions. If I knew he was out here, I probably would have ate elsewhere.

However, here I sat. Silently my blue eyes followed the tall brunettes moves. The sun made his hair shine. Even from where I was sitting, you could see the sun glowing off his tanned sweaty body. He was obviously over heating, as he has unbuttoned his shirt partway. This showed off his perfectly toned and muscular chest. His movements were all so, perfect and precise. The smile danced on his lips, as I leaned my head back and groaned.

"Damn it." My voice sounded deflated as I whispered to myself. My gaze once more locking onto his form again, I found it almost impossible to look away.

I was unaware, how long I was eyeing him for. Though I watched as one of his friends nudged him in the ribs. Then proceeded to nod in my direction. My heart pounded as Ryuuzaki suddenly turned his head, and our eyes locked together.

"Shit." I cursed out as I quickly diverted my eyes, downwards at the grass I sat on.

"Guys, I will catch up with you later." Hearing his words, I glanced up slowly. He waved to his friends and then ran over towards me.

A gulp left my throat, as I watched him drop his perfectly toned body down next to mine. His eyes were on me, as I saw him smile. With him this close, I could clearly see the tiny droplets of sweat on his form. They started from his neck, gliding along his tanned skin towards his chest.

_"Fuck!"_

I internally curse in my mind. Glancing down to my brown paper lunch bag, I struggle with trying to keep my thoughts together.

"So, how was your first class?"

"Look." Finding my voice, I speak up. My eyes focusing on anything, anything but him that is. "You really don't need to do this. This whole, 'mentor' thing. I am used to being the new kid, a loner. Trust me, I have many years of practice at this."

"Then how about this, we do the whole friends thing then." He spoke out deeply. "Man, it's hot out today. How the hell are you not overheating? You are wearing a sweater."

My eyes glance up to him, yah. Big Mistake.

There he was, unbuttoning the rest of his white shirt. My eyes went wide, as I struggled to look away from him. Letting his shirt fall open, he exposed his six pack. I knew he must of had an amazing body, but damn. My face starts to tingle, as I feel it heating up slightly.

"I..." Looking back at the grass, and away from his body I let out a sigh. "I don't think the whole, 'friends' thing will work." I mumbled quietly.

"Why not? It must start to get lonely, being just by yourself."

"I..." My flicker my gaze back up to his. My blue eyes, getting lost in his deep brown ones. "I..." This was a first for myself. I was sitting here, before him. Completely lost for words. No matter how many times I parted my lips to speak, nothing came out.

_"What the actual fuck Hikaru! Damn it!"_

My voice screams inside of my head. I hate to admit this, but it has been some time. Since I actually met a guy, who I truly found attractive.

"Just remember this Hikaru, you have one friend here." He gave me such a welcoming, and honest smile. I watch him stand as he grins at me before walking away. "I will catch you later, Hikaru."

My gaze merely follows him as he walks off. I don't know if he felt my eyes on him, but he glanced over his shoulder at me. Giving another smile, he then disappeared inside the school.

Dropping my heads into my hands. I grasp my bright dyed hair in my fingers. "Damn it, is there anything he isn't perfect at?" My voice was quiet and weak as I stared back to my pathetic excuse of a lunch.

...

Somehow, I managed to survive my next class of the day. Math, how though? I do not know. But sadly as always, the lesson only made me more confused than I was before. I get why my mom and the principal, said I needed a tutor. But why him? Couldn't they have picked any other person?

Hoping my last lesson of the day goes by quickly. I walk my way towards my Advanced Literature classroom. Upon entering the room, I freeze in my spot. 

There he was, Ryuuzaki Amano. Standing with arms folded over his chest. His body leaning, against a desk. Brown hair swaying from his movements, as he laughs at whatever his friend said.

Blinking my eyes, I was lost in thoughts. Until a voice from behind, cleared my mind. "You must be Hikaru Yamashita, welcome to Advanced Literature."

"Yah." Was all I could mumble. I hated teachers making a huge fuss, over me joining their classes.

"Class, if I can get your attention. Let me introduce our newest student, Hikaru Yamashita. He is a junior, who will be joining in our lessons. Care to say anything about yourself?" She asked softly. A soft smile on her lips, as she looked to me.

"No." That was all I said, my eyes downcast to the floor.

"Oh, I see." Clearly she didn't expect that from me. "Do take the empty desk at the back there."

Nodding my head, I walk through the rows of seniors. Doing my very best, to ignore the feeling of their eyes following my every move. Momentarily I glance up, and my eyes met Ryuuzaki's. He flashed me a smile, as I quickly adverted my gaze. Getting to my new desk. I place my belongings down on it, and flop down into the seat.

My elbow then rests on top of the desk, as I lay my head in my hand. It was almost a struggle, to not look his direction. But I was weak, and my gaze fell upon him. However what shocked me more, was he was glancing over his shoulder at me. When he saw me catching his gaze, he quickly turned back to facing the front. This made me roll my eyes as I sighed to myself.

As the last lesson for the day goes on. My mind slowly starts to wander into nothingness. My right hand moved to slowly run up and down my left arm, as it was still propped up. This was a habit I seemed to always do, a habit that I did without even really noticing it to much.

Completely lost in my thoughts, I jumped in my seat as I heard the loud school bell ring. Slowly gathering up my belongings once more into my arms. My body stands from the desk, by now I was already the last one to exit the room. Leaving the now quiet classroom behind, I step out into the crowded and noisy hallway.

"Hikaru." Stopping in my spot, I flick my head to the side and there he was. Leaning against the wall outside the class, waiting for me.

"What do you want?" I asked, in a bored dull voice.

Looking to him, I see another smile on his face. Does this guy never stop smiling? "Well, I was hoping we could talk."

"Talk?" My voice showed my shock, as I stared at him.

"Yah talk, you know. Get to know one another." He shrugged softly. To him this was no big deal what so ever.

My eyes went wide as I stared at him, my body frozen in my place. "Why, why the hell do you want to know anything about me?"

He rubbed the back of his neck, as his shoulders shrugged softly once more. "Don't know." 

By now the hall was half empty, students didn't seem to want to waste unnecessary time here.

"That isn't a good enough reason, as to why I should spill my life and secrets to you." I mumbled sounding slightly annoyed.

"Well, I guess." His eyes flickered to the floor, before he looked back up to meet my gaze. "Because you are different than everyone else here." My eyes blinked confused. He however only grins playfully and lightly punches my arm. "Anyone ever tell you, that you are really short for a guy?"

"Shut the hell up." The growl left my lips, as I shot him a glare.

"Hey, I don't mean it is a bad thing though. There are a lot of good things, that come from being small." His voice grew more silent, than before. "It feels perfect, holding someone your size." His cheeks went slightly pink as I stared at him in shock.

"What did you just say?" How could he say that? Even his so called bitch of a girlfriend, was taller than myself.

"Never mind. Uh, can I give you a ride home?"

"No." Turning away from him, I start to once again head for my locker.

"You may be able to push everyone else away." My feet stop, as he called out to me. "But do not think, I will be as easy to get rid of." My head whips around to look at him. He merely grinned at me, before walking off in the opposite direction.

I couldn't understand this jock. But why, why on earth did he wish to know me more. It made no sense to be honest. I am clearly not the type of friend he hangs out with.

"Stupid idiot." I grumbled under my breath. As per my usual, I pull my headphones from around my neck, and place them over my ears. With loud music blasting, I get to my locker. Grabbing what I needed from inside of it. I throw my bag over my shoulder, than slowly make my way home.

...


End file.
